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10 March 2007 @ 02:36 am
TITLE: Crazy is infectious
GENRE: For general readers (:
PAIRING: none xD
DISCLAIMER: I'd say I owned one of them but people may kill me so iwilljustshutupnow xD
NOTES: I asked for ideas, "Help me with my plot bunny!" I said. So ryoki_chu, the darling, asked me to write a Yamada fic dedicated to figuramalaya who has been depreived of her Yamasexda goodness. My plot bunnies took a holiday and left all but one standing, inspired in itself by a post figuramalaya herself made. 8D
oh and, I do know who several juniors are, BUT I don't know them WELL, so be warned kay? xD
SUMMARY: This has no plot whatsoever. IDK what it is. A bunch of words on wordpad? *shott*


“There’s too much violence in this world.” He said it in a standard tone. Very matter of fact. Nakajima Yuuto stared.

“Excuse me?”

“That’s just it isn’t it? Why people are always chugging alcohol down their throats in an attempt to drown their sorrows and all that. There isn’t enough looovee.” And at that last word, Yamada Ryosuke bit down into his chocolate bar in silence.

Yuuto stared at his best friend with a look that clearly demanded answers. But Yamachan did not continue. Instead, he examined his bitten chocolate and mumbled to himself before grabbing another bar off the table and pocketing it. 

“Yamachan? You’re scaring me.” Yuuto folded his arms and set the magazine he was reading (it was about reptiles and he really didn’t want to stop but other matters demanded his attention). Yamada glanced back at his friend curiously and laughed.

“The look on your face!” Laugh. “Go find a mirror. Ahahahaha!” With that, he walked away.


“You know, we should all do something about it. This terrible fate that has been cursed upon our land. I know what the leaders all need.” A stunned Morimoto stared wordlessly at the chattering Yamada.

“Chocolate and candy. Anything nice and sweet will do. Kato-kun told me once that sugar sends nice vibes to the brain. If every leader in the world had access to candy, there’ll be no more violence!” Yamada threw up his hands in the air at his final proclamation and grinned to himself. He muttered something about asking Taisuke where the chocolate place was again and walked innocently away. The Ryutaro glanced at his brother who had paused momentarily to gather his colour pencils together. Shintaro saw his brother looking and giggled.

“The look on your face!” He turned back to his drawing with a hand over his mouth.


Yamada barged into Yuuto’s bedroom without so much of a hello. His shirt flapped lazily against his chest as he flopped excitedly on the bed. Today Yamachan decided that fashion was secondary because the shirt he wore was so oversized it hid his toned arms and covered his knees as he sat.

“Your mum let me in so I assumed you aren’t busy. It doesn’t matter anyway because I have this brilliant idea!” Yamada bounced a little on the springy bed and pushed his fringe from his eyes.

“I am going to be a terrorist!”

Yuuto gaped open mouthed at his best friend. Clearly, he had missed something along the way. He did not just hear his buddy proclaim to be one of the greatest threats their world was currently facing.

“Wanna be one too? We’ll take over America because that’s where I heard all the action is! My English isn’t that bad is it? Do not be move!” The overjoyed boy did not seem to notice the confused and worried look clouding the younger boy’s eyes as he grabbed the nearest plush toy (out of the numerous ones that crowded Yuuto’s bed) and started making silly faces at the cuddly croc.

Yuuto dragged his chair closer to where his friend sat and waved his hand frantically over the other’s vision to get his attention. “Um, Yamachan? I don’t think --- that’s going to be possible. We have uhm --- work and yeah, so we can’t travel.”

Yuuto felt like hitting himself over the head with his baseball bat. Why was he even playing along? But then again, to see the light diminish from his friend’s over eager eyes and to have to watch his friend deflate as the disappointment hit him… It would be easier to just comply.

Yamada jumped up at that remark and clapped his hands. “That’s no problem! I got it all figured out! Because before we can actually get to AMERICA,” and here Yuuto noticed the bright gleam to Yamada’s eyes. “We have to test this theory! And who to better test it on then…”

No, please don’t say it. Not Johnny-san, no Yamachan. You have more sense than THAT surely!


Yuuto blinked. Twice. He could not have heard wrongly again surely. But Yamada was already babbling about the next Shounen Club recording a few days away and how it would be great if they could get the help of the other juniors – and why not ask J.J. Express? They were always willing to help.

Nakajima Yuuto shook his head in disbelief. Yamada Ryosuke could NOT be serious.


But Yamada had never had a more concrete idea in his head as he did then. He emptied out his weekly allowance and bought twenty different kinds of cavity-inducing snacks. The older ones in J.J. Express had laughed and brushed him off but Hashimoto and Arioka, unfortunately, had themselves sweet-talked into creating a distraction while Yamada put his plan into action.

Nakamaru walked into the studio to delirious giggles and curious, darting glances his way. He nodded curiously in greeting and wondered what the juniors were hyper about that particular day. The staff handed him his script and costumes for the day and left him in the dressing room. The cupboard door rattled suspiciously but Maru did not notice as he hummed gaily to himself, pacing the room slowly.

Yamada did not pause to think and it all happened very quickly. The door to Maru’s room burst open just as he was fumbling with his belt and the two J.J. Express members tumbled into the room in a game of hair-tug. Maru gaped at the two boys screaming and tugging at each other – like a pair of girls! – and Yamda took that moment to shove five rolls of candy and a chocolate bear into the open cavity of Nakamaru Yuichi. The said victim spluttered and coughed but fell heavily on his behind as he was tackled fiercely by the over enthusiastic Yamada. Pinching Maru’s cheeks, Yamada nodded towards the hard earned treats and made swallowing motions.

Nakamaru coughed and shoved Yamada aside; his eyebrows furrowed, expression unreadable.

“You too?!” Nakamaru stood up and brushed himself off hastily. Grabbing Yamada’s wrist roughly, he hauled the tall boy to his feet and began dragging towards the main lounge area. Yamada snickered and ran to keep up with the longer strides of Maru.

“We have to rid this world of evil! Guys, who wants chocolate?”

Nakamaru shouted and waved his arms in the air, dragging Yamada’s as his so. The wide grin etched over Yamada’s face seemed to radiate its happiness out in waves and Yuuto could do nothing but gape. Yamachan could not --- is not --- Yuuto refused to believe it.


“Hey! Hey! Hey! OI!”

Yuuto’s eyes snapped open as his body was roughly shaken. He groaned and squinted up at his best friend. Yamada smiled his dimpled smile and his eyes twinkled against his fair skin. “Nightmare.” Yuuto sat up straight and grabbed Yamada’s wrist.

“Yamachan, Yamachan you’re okay right? Talk to me!”

Yamada tilted his head curiously and gave a toothy grin. His brown eyes shone with mirth and he nodded reassuringly at Yuuto. “It was just a bad dream again.”

Sighing in relief, Yuuto released his grip and clutched at his forhead tiredly. He did not notice Yamada’s eyes gleam mischievously as the wrapper crinkled when it was torn. The brown chocolate bar peeked out of the aluminum wrapping. The screams outside the door muffled Yamada’s husky whisper.



oh gawd its two am in the morning o_o i hope i didnt screw this up D:

「セーラ」: 「∮」 HwM - Shigeautumnjaide on March 9th, 2007 10:24 pm (UTC)

That was SOOOO random~! XDDDDD
ryoki_chu: NewS giant octopus bukkakeryoki_chu on March 10th, 2007 05:58 am (UTC)
I can't believe you actually wrote it, no?

Especially is he gets it all over his lips X3

Terrorize~ Nyahah!
figuramalaya on March 11th, 2007 11:44 am (UTC)
i love you....

...i really do.

Yamada ryosuke, I LOVE YOU!!!!!!